Now that we are approaching twelve weeks, I wanted to take a moment to reflect back on where we've been together - Anna, Curt and I.
Week One: From the moment I saw her, I kept thinking, "I did NOT just birth that tiny little perfect person. Uh uh. No way." I kept just looking at her thinking that there's no way I created Anna. Staring, I was amazed at every little sound and movement. I didn't get any sleep, but strangely enough, didn't need it. I was running on pure awe!
Often heard from my mouth: "How the heck am I doing this? I used to only be able to go ONE DAY with this little sleep!"
Week Two: We moved into our new home, in our new city and I felt temporarily overwhelmed!!! Yikes! How the heck do I keep little Anna alive and happy without constant supervision.... of ME! I was settling in to feeling like a mom but still didn't know my role or our rhythms. I still felt like I was winging it. Also, I still felt like Anna was a little stranger. I was impatient for us to get to know each other.
Often heard: (When people asked me, "Do you think she's hungry?" "Do you think she needs her diaper changed" etc.) "I don't know" "Who knows?" "Maybe!" (Shoulder shrug)
Week Three: OK, now we were on a roll. Anna was more alert and fussy and I was getting more and more sleep deprived! But, I was more confident that we would skirt the colic monsters and I was learning a little more about her! This was the week we learned about Anna's stinky torticollis. My poor baby with a bum neck. This would simply not do! We learned some neck excercises that Anna was not a fan of and began to do those daily! (Oh man!)
Often heard: "Must get sleep, must get sleep."
Weeks four - five: Anna was REALLY stimulated and fussy now but also more alert. Also, she was too strong and active to be easily swaddled. Also, my sleep deprivation was reaching emergency levels at this point and many days would find Anna and I in tears. Luckily, I had big sis Emily to call who talked me down from my wailings of, "I love her but I'm SO MAD at her!!!" My love for her was really deepening at this point as she and I rode the waves of these early weeks. I was starting to get what everyone means when they say that they'd die for their kids. She was smiling by this point (our little overachiever) and that was just lovely!
Often heard: "Ohhhh I love her so much!" "HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY STILL BE CRYING" "Oh my gosh, is she supposed to be on a schedule? The schedule doesn't work. There's something wrong with me! There's something wrong with Anna! Sleep, sleep....OMG I NEED SLEEP!" (Luckily at this point, Curt stepped in and hid the ridiculous baby books from me. Those things are dangerous!)
Week Six: Anna and I found our groove. She was feeling more settled in her world and I was feeling like I had the hang of things. Also, my sleep deprivation took a big turn! I started to feel like my old self again.
Oftten heard: "Gooshie gooshie goo! Anna Bananna Pants! Who's moommy's little girlie whirlykins?" Etc.!
Week Seven-Eight: More smiles and more developements. I love her so much! She is holding her head up on her own a little bit more. What a big girl! She let me read her a WHOLE book and held a toy that her dad gave her!
Often heard: "Ewwww - you are the BEST!"
Week Nine: OH THE HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!! Vaccinations!!!!!!!!!!! My poor little angel got stuck by those mean old nurses and it took all week for her to recover! I swear I had tears in my eyes even before she did. Seeing her eyes widen in shock the second those needles went in made me age ten years! I made several emergency calls to Saint Emily this week. My poor baby learned that there was pain in the world and I learned what it feels like when your child feels pain. What a week!!! On a fun note, she sat in the bumbo chair for the first time! She looked like such a big girl!
Often heard: "Waaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! (From both Anna AND I)
Week Eleven: What a wonderful and strange week! Anna was so close to rolling over! She also learned a game where we hold her under her arms and she shoots (not just stands) up! Then she'll do a cute little baby dance on her wobbly legs and sit back down. She was just plain happy, happy (except close to nap times - which she has unfortunately not decided just when those will be). What a joy to be a mom to the most amazing baby that ever lived!
Often heard: "Who's my big girl?" "Can I get a smile?" "KISS ATTACK!"
So here we are at week 12! Anna still hasn't decided on a schedule yet and her naps are all over the place (30 mins to two hours - more often 30 minutes). She still goes to bed anywhere between 8:00 and midnight - just to keep us guessing how much sleep we'll actually get. BUT, once asleep she usually sleeps for 12 hours with a couple of feeding thrown in for good measure. She just noticed the kitties and has big smiles for them - they completely igore her - so like a cat! She isn't as addicted to her mobile anymore ("That was like - so last week!" We are still struggling with her torticollis - meaning, she is struggling against the excercises, but I can tell her neck is getting better and better.
What a joy Anna is on her big 12 week birthday!!! We love you Anna!